A Sunday school teacher was telling her class the story of the Good
Samaritan, in which a man was beaten, robbed and left for dead. She
described the situation in vivid detail so her students would catch the
drama. Then, she asked the class, "If you saw a person lying on the
roadside, all wounded and bleeding, what would you do?"
A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence, "I think I'd throw
up."
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DID NOAH FISH?
A Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of
fishing when he was on the Ark ?" "No," replied Johnny. "How could
he, with just two worms."
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HIGHER POWER:
A Sunday school teacher said to her children, "We have been learning
how powerful kings and queens were in Bible times. But, there is a
higher power. Can anybody tell me what it is?"
One child blurted out, "Aces!"
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MOSES & THE RED SEA :
Nine-year-old Joey, was asked by his mother what he had learned in
Sunday school. "Well, Mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses
behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of
Egypt . When he got to the Red Sea , he had his army build a pontoon
bridge and all the people walked across safely. Then, he radioed
headquarters for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the
bridge and all the Israelites were saved and the Egyptians all drowned.
"Now, Joey, is that really what your teacher ta! ught you ?" h is mother
asked.
"Well, no, Mom. But, if I told it the way the teacher did, you'd never
believe it!"
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THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD:
A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young class memorize one
of the most quoted passages in the Bible; Psalm 23. She gave the
youngsters a month to learn the verse. Little Rick was excited about
the task, but, he just couldn't remember the Psalm. After much
practice, he could barely get past the first line.
On the day that the kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in front of
the congregation, Ricky was so nervous. When it was his turn, he
stepped up to the microphone and said proudly, "The Lord is my
Shepherd, and that's all I need to know."
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UNANSWERED PRAYER?
The preacher's 5 year-old daughter noticed that her father always
paused and bowed his head, for a moment, before star ting his sermon.
One day, she asked him why. "Well, Honey," he began, proud that his
daughter was so observant of his messages, "I'm asking the Lord to help
me preach a good sermon."
"How come He doesn't do it?" she asked.
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BEING THANKFUL
A rabbi said to a precocious six-year-old boy, "So your mother says
your prayers for you each night? Very commendable. What does she
say?"
The little boy replied, "Thank God he's in bed!"
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UNTIMELY ANSWERED PRAYER
During the minister's prayer, one Sunday, there was a loud whistle
from one of the back pews. Gary 's mother was horrified. She pinched
him into silence and, after church, asked, " Gary , whatever made you
do such a thing?"
Gary answered, soberly, "I asked God to teach me to whistle, and He
just then did!"
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TIME TO PRAY:
A pastor asked a little boy if he said his prayers every night. "Yes
sir," the boy replied.
"And, do you always say them in the morning, too?" the pastor asked.
"No sir," the boy replied. "I ain't scared in the daytime."
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BEWARE OF TRASH:
One particular four-year old prayed, "And forgive us our 'trash
baskets' as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."
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ALL MEN/ALL GIRLS?
When my daughter, Kelli, was 3, she and my son, Cody, would say their
nightly prayers, together.
As most children do, we have to bless every family member, every
friend, and every animal (current and past).
For several weeks, after we had finished the nightly prayer, Kelli
would say, "And all girls."
As this soon became part of her nightly routine, to include this at the
end, my curiosity got the best of me and I asked her, "Kelli, why do
you always add the part about all girls?"
Her response, "Because we always finish our prayers by saying 'All
Men'!"
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SAY A PRAYER:
Little Johnny and his family were having Sunday dinner at his
Grandmother's house.
Everyone was seated around the table as the food was being served. When
little Johnny received his plate, he started eating right away.
"Johnny wait until we say our prayer."
"I don't have to," The boy replied.
"Of course, you do," his mother insisted. "We say a prayer, before
eating, at our house."
"That's at our house," Johnny explained. "But this is Grandma's house
and she knows how to cook."
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